Yes, This Could Be You (It Actually Already Is)
How Are You Inspiring To Others?
I’m asking you directly … what are doing TODAY to improve your social life, your intimacy?
Are you static? Are you saying the things (to yourself and to women) you’ve always said? Maybe parroting what seems to work for other kinds of men? Do you wish you had something better to offer than old-hat “openers” and old-hat rapport-builders?
In other words, are you stuck in habits of the familiar simply because you they are familiar? And aching to break out into a new phase of your life, but you don’t know how?
The key question as always — are you consciously evolving?
Because we are ALL evolving whether we like it or not — it’s just that most men are unconscious of it, and so put up resistance to personal change. They are afraid of shaking off their old skins.
But shaking off old skin, or having it micro-derm abrasioned, to use a less snakey metaphor, allows the new skin to emerge.
Wanna be attractive to women? Then welcome and encourage your personal evolution.
You, as a man who may be part of this growing community have been learning something about developing a stronger spine, a deeper heart and a more expansive, uniquely individual sense of purpose.
If you are SERIOUSLY interested in attracting a quality intimate partner (and CONTINUE t attract her), you’ve got to ask yourself: what are you really offering her? How are you an INSPIRATION to women — not because of what you merely CONVEY to them, but because of who you authentically are?
The point of being part of my learning community is to grow into being a more resonant, magnetic presence and a more purposeful, admirable man among men. That is my personal goal and here’s why it should be yours: because ultimately, women want to ADMIRE you. More that that, they NEED to admire you if they are not going to find you boring, narcissistic and uninspired, sooner or later, as they do with so many men.
So I’ll add here: welcome change, welcome your evolution — but welcome your evolution into BEING AN INSPIRATIONAL MAN.
How do you do that? What does that even mean? Let’s start with a question about who you are now…
For what aspects of your life do you admire yourself? Are you thoughtful? Caring? Resolute? Hard-working? Creative? Helpful? A good friend, brother, son, neighbor? Do you help others laugh? For what do your family members or friends admire you? Are you sharing that part of yourself with women, or are you covering that with false shells of what you “think” they want from a man? Here’s the truth: they want YOU, and they are searching for the part of you that can inspire them.
Recently, I read great book called “Igniting Inspiration,” by an author (and new friend) named John Marshall Roberts. It’sabout effective communication and how to INSPIRE different types of people, specifically for public speaking and persuasion.
And I found that it resonates perfectly with what I’ve been saying in my work about online and offline communication. If you read Deep Attraction Online — then you know the chapter about how to contextualize your job or your work into how you SERVE others. No matter what you do for a living.
Because serving others, believe it or not, is who you really are, whether at work or outside of work — it is your heroic core, even if you don’t usually think about it that way. A hero, a king, a warrior is never about his own goals. And women want heros, kings and (spirituai) warriors.
If you’re a little confused about how you might “serve,” this may help…
About midway through John’s book, he details four specific types of people, and what it is they “serve.” I want to share it with you because I think it might help you articulate how YOU serve the world. As you read this list below, think hard about your life. Chances are you already embody one of these types more than the others. In this is a clue to what women may find admirable about you — and a clue to the type of woman with whom you would most easily connect.
The four categories of Service are: 1. Purpose 2. Profit 3. People 4. Planet
Let me put this into language that might reflect what’s in your head, and could shine through your online profile. Think how you can take the spirit of each of these “types: and translate it into how you communicate yourself, both online and offline:
PURPOSE — “I am all about principles. I know right from wrong and I’ll die defending what I know to be right and good. I am a bottom line person who believes that we are not here to indulge ourselves, but to build something good, right and strong. If that means self-sacrifice, fine with me. I’m not about me. I’m a soldier for the good.” (Archetype: The keeper of order, the strong king, the protector)
PROFIT — “I believe in individual expression and I am the kind of guy who is going to get out there and create what I want. There is nothing more glorious than a person picking himself up by his bootstraps and shaping the world around his will. If people were honest, everyone would go for what he wants, but I understand that others are scared or weak or just can’t muster up ambition. I am on a journey and what I value in a woman is someone who “gets” that I’m here to make my mark in the world and will be by my side as I do so. (Archetype: The self-made man, the entrepreneur, the business leader)
PEOPLE — “I am an evolved and evolving man, who has no interest in the winner-take-all approach to life. I know that success is win-win, and that every person deserves respect and to be heard. I don’t make decisions rashly. I listen. I try to understand what the other is saying, and I am happiest when helping to bring people into alignment and progress. I love women who are compassionate and spiritual, who have a great love not only for their men, but for humanity as a whole.” (Archetype: the wise man, the fair king)
PLANET — “This planet is in peril and the systems that are running things are poisoning our food, weakening our bodies and setting neighbor against neighbor. The old ways of doing things must end and I consider myself a spiritual warrior for the evolution of the species and as a defender of the health of the planet.” (Archetype: the visionary, wizard archetype, the protector not only of family and town but of all beings)
Do any of these archetypes resonate with you? Or do you embody other archetypes that you believe women find admirable?
Try not to judge the ones that you are not. They are all valid and all have admirable qualities — and each will resonate with a different category of woman.
So, here’s your assignment, today…
1. Own Your Virtue: If you ever apologize for who you are — don’t. Not everyone has the same values, and what you really want is a woman who admires you for your category of values.
2. See women who already admire your kind of masculine service. It’s easier to connect and you are more likely to create a happy partnership
3. Online Profile – work what makes you admirable into your profile. If you’re unsure how to do that, reread the chapter on how to talk about your job or work in your online profile in the book, DeepAttractionOnline.com . We will be talking about this in my new “inner circle” memebership site (coming soon). The key: think beyond mere attraction. Communicate what makes you admirable as a man.
I want you to inspire the best kind of woman to truly appreciate and love you. Because when it comes to intimacy, it doesn’t get better — or more inspirational — than that. There is nothing more invigorating than the love and support of a great woman.
Aim high. Live for high purpose. Live so that you admire yourself and what you are bringing into the world.
And watch how the quality of woman you attract rises and rises.
Your Friend,
Adam
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